Episodes Colliding - Opening New Moments of Grace?

Episodes Colliding - Opening New Moments of Grace?

We have episodes in life. Each one brings its joys or challenges, its strains and stresses.

Occasionally an episode we recognise as coming from our pasts returns and brings nothing. Or at least what appears to us in that moment as being insignificant. We experience it. Then it just passes by - as if in orbit around us. It is soon gone - perhaps to return another day.

Sometimes, though, old and new episodes meet and collide. Violently, with one unprotected occurrence barging into another that we had hoped to keep separate. It is a snippet of the past smashing uninvited into a present reality. This startles us, but still – we are gratified when it can do so helpfully: as in a wrong acknowledged as or a promise fulfilled.

So episode collisions are not necessarily bad. Yet often we fear them. They seem unpredictable; each one seems to obey different rules. Some orbit but then suddenly plummet. Others rise slowly, like a heavenly dragon, and then suddenly fly and change pace and direction in the blink of an eyelid. It is as if Episodes know that they are of us but not always content to be with us. So they simply refuse to respect the linear sequences in which we now live our daily lives. We are therefore understandably cautious, maintaining our defences against them just in case. Indeed, more often than not, each close encounter may serve to justify our caution and sensitivity.

Yet we know from experience that episodes can usher in GOOD stuff. If we allow ourselves to be generous and to receive them with openness - these episode collisions can usher in helpful transitions. They can free us to explore. We can hitch a ride on their wing as they whip past. We can let them engulf and carry us away. We can rediscover what it feels like to be free to imagine and to see our imagination turn into reality.

Then we become like time travellers. We are transported in spacecrafts into journeys made of memory fragments of our past. It is as if some knowing curator had faithfully gathered what we had broken or left behind as we rushed into our futures: putting it together and keeping it safe for a future more opportune moment. A moment when we may be more ready.

And now that we are stronger, wiser or more gracious. More open to see our own lived 'relics', we can meet or even join our hitherto slient pasts, to create yet a new episode. But hopefully this time it is one that is more willing to stay with us. It has fragments of old episodes. But this time it feels more safe. It is returning to be useful and resilient, different from how it was the first time around. We can now relax and be confident to shake hands with our historic periodicals; knowing we can re-read and carry away with us as much, or as little, as we wish and find useful.

So the lesson may be that: when old and new episodes collide in our presence we feel the power they release. We notice that although it is a raw and uncertain power it is still capable of holding us. Then we have choice, for we can run, curse, or kick at this embrace. We can also fold into it. Be willing to feel for it, recognise it and face it. After all, we are ourselves, in this mature and grounded place, are not without power. The question we face now is one of acknowleding this and holding it as we repeatedly encounter old episodes crashing into the pressure fields of our current ones.

If we are well-centred we may now, at last be able to dedicate ourselves to remaining open. If we can resist the urge to flee this unfolding moment. If we can let that "thrust" or this "beckon" meet with us in our most grounded self. If we can let this power become once more part of what we are and what we may be able to change, or even to let go completely. Then possibly we can carry with us an ownership of all that we experienced but had left behind. And also, discover what we have here and now that is very precious, but we have been closed to.

Maybe then - when our episodes past and present meet or collide there is a moment of grace that opens: beckoning to us to be brave to reach out; to touch; to re-create; and possibly to live – afresh with our pasts in the lively and only place we can be now - Our Present.

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challenge    living well    openness    reflection    self-awareness   


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